advertisement

2016-09-28-1475094935-8902090-image.png

Well, I think it goes without saying thatNASA has just rocked everyone's worlds.

But, probably for the better, right? I mean, it's not like things were really working all that smoothly before. Now maybe everyone can just Google their new astrological sign, take copious notes, tweak out some personality adjustments and get on down the road. Things should just fall nicely into place.

I know that's what I'm counting on...

It's pretty liberating to think such a minor astrological glitch was the reason the entire world has been so off-kilter all this time. All of humankind was just super confused about who we really are. Metaphysically speaking, that is.

The first thing that's going to improve in my life as a result of this new information, is my marriage. All this time -- over 30 years -- we've been under the false impression that my husband and I are BOTH Aries.

How in the world can two people be as different as we are in almost every possible way and yet both be the same astrological sign? (It's almost enough to make one skeptical of Astrology as a guiding life principle.)

Well.... The answer is simple. We can't! That's been the problem all along.

I'm really a Pisces. It makes perfect sense. I'm actually just a confused fish swimming in two different directions. Sensitive, creative and soulful. No wonder I don't eat seafood and I can't get out of the bathtub. I'm a fish. To think that I've spent over 50 years thinking I was a damn Ram. All because of those stinkin' Babylonians.

Qualities such as leadership, organization and willful determination are off the table as of today. No more pressure. Being headstrong, open to challenges, and standing firm are a part of my past. Everyone knows fish don't stand firm. We are floppy.

I've been reading all about my new self online and I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty stoked. I certainly can't be expected to lead anyone when I'm swimming in two different directions. I just read that my "intuitiveness" holds me"in good stead when it comes to prosperity." I don't know what that means exactly, but probably that I would find a good Aries Man to marry.

I actually was so excited about my new sign that I looked up everyone in my family's new signs. This isn't just going to benefit humanity and my marriage, it's going to change the very essence of inter-familial relationships.

Our oldest daughter and son just went from Scorpio to Libra. Our second daughter shifts from Virgo to Leo. Our third daughter from Gemini to Taurus (that figures) and our baby stays right on the cusp of Gemini and Cancer. But wait a minute... according to this chart my husband is actually a Pisces with me now? He's very close to Aries, but technically a Pisces also?

That can't be right. My family needs leadership.

I think I'm going to have to put together my own hybrid-style chart. This is serious stuff. They're messing with people's marriages and families now.

This could be a serious game-changer. Or, at the very least a matching-tattoo changer.

Read more on:
http://agingersnapped.com

Earlier on Huff/Post50:

The Wall

No comments
You need to sign in to comment
advertisement

Advertisement

advertisement

Users

Search News